Exactly on our 6th month. 

From December 1 to June 1, I experienced, for the first time, how it is having a girlfriend.

She called it off, realizing that she, all along, was never ready to enter a new relationship.

Now this is new that your friend Jonas was not the one who made the move to end something.  I know some people have this prejudice that I would be the cause of everything bad that would come between me and the girl.

In this case, it is good that she was the one who called it off. 

Hey, this is not a hate entry for Tere.  I believe she explained her side very well.  Besides, if she did not do the first move of breaking up with me, then it would be me doing it.  Right there and then too, mind you. Dun naman na rin papunta since the feeling that I was her boyfriend had a minimal absorption in me.  I always felt that it was as if I were a mere suitor.

In this case, it is good that she was the one who called it off.

At least, hindi ako yung nakasakit.

I swear by the orangest robe in Tibet:  I'll never cut my hair again.  Never.

Unearthed this is my rotten site: www.freewebs.com/since1985 

I'll never cut my hair again.

:::::::::::::::::::::

Lately, I can't write anything in the sacred name of coherence. Dumb dumb dumb of me. Or is it just that I can't write anything at all? Hey a girl just broke up with me, shouldn't I write something about that??

OK
Just for the sake of doing so.
Let's write.
About that.
Yeah.
Just for the fucking sake of doing so.
I have no subtle agenda.
Oh, and I'm not defensive.
Not at all.
Just for the mere fucking sake of the default verb of my future profession!!!! (Writing)
Im not defensive.
For the love of God.

Here it goes

Yeah, so I met her on the first day of my second year in college.  Reshuffling of sections.  Alphabetical seating arrangements.  Then, quite instatnly, I had a crush on her because she was this extremely Filipina who would not initiate a conversation unless you'd pioneer in doing so. Also, she suddenly turned effortlessly pleasing to my eyes. I started having this internally tickling feeling everytime I would listen to my favorite MP3 files while thinking of the next school day when I could finally lay my eyes on her again. 

So she became a big-time crush.

Princess' Debut. I was invited and was asked to dance for the completion of her 18 roses.  It was a Saturday.  By Monday, Princess brought the roses that were used on that dance and gave it to all who participated.  I received mine. With just enough courage from Paolo, Don, Niel and Miko, I took the risk of giving it to her. She was reluctant at first. "Saan ko naman ilalagay yan? Ang laki laki, masisira lang yan," I can remember her declining the beautiful white rose that I was offering.  I almost lost a heart of persevering when a bright idea suddenly came into my mind.  "E anu lalo gagawin ko dito! Ahmmm e sayang naman. 'Pag nakita ng mga tao sakin yan isipin pa bading ako. Lagasin nalang natin yung mga petals tapos ipitin mo sa kahit anong book. Tapos itapon mo nalang pag-uwi mo," I remember telling her half-jokingly but on a serious tone.

She agreed.  So we tore the white rose petals off their sepals or whatever! I mean, yeah their stem... And as we finished, she went to her bag to get her Math book.  She opened the book very randomly and landed on a certain page.  I can recall that the page had no elephant ears nor book marks nor any form of markings that would make her fall on it!  For God's sake it did not even contain the lesson we were having at that time!  It was some angel's will I think.  I knew that she saw what page it was and I prevented her from changing it due to a huge awkwardness that was drawn between the two of us by saying, "Hindi sige dun nalang...." 

For the wholeness of my mortality, it was Page 143. Freaking Page 1-4-3.  Damn it.

I was earlier planning to do a full story about us up to our end but I suddenly grew lazy. I'll just do a follw-up (Yak! ahahahaha as if may interisado.)

Nakakatamad.
A potential continuation depends on my mood.

Ahahahah!! For now, you may spare me the effort of ridiculing this crap. Because I already know to my self that this illustration is trash!

Hahahaha but pls give me time i really want to learn!! For now, I am only using paint and MS Word (haha) and the most basic of the photo editors. such a loser....

One of these days, i will outshine angela! wahahahahahah!! joke.

Meet April. (-:

Dub dubdub dubdubdubdubdubdub

hahah!

Err-- She's my very first crush.  I met her when we were 5. Err-- Everybody (my family, her family, nursery teachers, nursery classmates) back then thought we were a cute couple and never stopped teasing us.  She's half German maybe that's why I noticed her quite instantly then.  She was a very pretty little girl.  And scary.  It was her profession to be a totally bratty snob-little bitch.  But very gorgeous just the same.  I wouldn't exchange a chance of sitting next to her for a 16er box of crayons.  I remembered that I would be more than pathetically satisfied just to see her hair.  I was the popular boy then. hahahahahaha! Yeah, then we were voted Mr. and Ms. Neumann's Learning Center. Cute. She was Ms. Germany and I was Mr. Korea. harhar. Very cute.

Then she fled for the States. When we were 15.

Now that we're 20, she told me she's coming back for a vacation. December. Im one hell of an excited boy. I'm just afraid that I totally changed. Physically. Negatively. While she didn't. Im afraid I'm not that cute little innocent boy who looks handsomely excusable in his underwear anymore. Why did I change for the fucking worse!!!!

Guys, what will I do?? I think she's hoping for an OK-looking Jonas. Damit.

But just the same, I want to see her again... hahaha who knows? The nursery characters might be correct in saying it would be us after all. hahahaha.

I'll bring her to UST huh. Be nice to her. (-:

Say something.

It's past 12.  I'm 20.

I just would like to thank my friend Rica Forto for that wonderful letter she gave me earlier.  It really helped in pacifying my angst about my age.  Being a teenager, I realized, was just something that I used as a strong excuse in making decisions and living life a bit irresponsibly.  There's nothing really amazing with that phase in my life.  Rica, your letter helped big time.  Thanks thanks thanks.

For the past weeks, I was subconsciously bothered about my turning 20 and my being out of the teenage population.  Not anymore, my friends assured me tis gonna be ok.

Sorry kung nabababawan kayo ah.  Big deal talaga kasi sa akin.

Tere greeted me a happy birthday.  I was very surprised and sincerely grateful.  The feeling was just something I couldn't explain.  I was positively overwhelmed.  Thank you.

Pati sa lahat ng nag-greet.  TY Liza. (-:

This is my very first entry as a 20-year-old.

The teenage jonas has signed off minutes ago. (-:

I can say ok naman maging 20.  Wala namang gaanong change. ahahahahahahahahah